


Prison Break

by Irritable_Fabulamancer



Series: The Prison Break Series [1]
Category: Sonic X, Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Don't expect this to make any kind of sense, Halloween Special, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-07
Updated: 2020-11-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:08:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27437104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Irritable_Fabulamancer/pseuds/Irritable_Fabulamancer
Summary: Halloween special oneshot. Cosmo's been stuck here long enough, and now seems like the perfect time to plan an escape...
Series: The Prison Break Series [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2124660
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	Prison Break

Cosmo emerged from the darkness into a massive, gleaming golden hall.

She looked at the crowd of warriors around her, all yelling about their latest accomplishments, singing truly tortuous war ballads, eating food drenched in enough grease to drown a forest, and drinking what smelled like sugary weedkiller - sometimes all at once - and proceeded to slam her head into the table and let out a muffled scream of frustration.

_That makes... how many tries, now?_

"Ey, corpse flower!" yelled a particularly loud man with an axe the size of the average garden shed. "Not bad! Ya took out, what, ten today?"

"Thirteen," she muttered tiredly, "not that it matters."

"Aw, come on!" The man raised his tankard. "Why don'tcha quit moping around and start having fun!" A very literal horde of similarly equipped, almost identical warriors cheered, for no good reason. "This is paradise, after all!"

To people not fluent, the Seedrian language sounds like a cross between Ry'lehian and someone trying to imitate radio static. Cosmo reflected that she had begun to consider this fortunate, as she said every swear word she knew.

* * *

She hated that she was getting used to this.

In Valhalla, there is no real death. When one of its residents dies, an extremely common occurrence, they simply pop back into existence when the feast-bell rings, just in time to regale their companions with tales of their glory in battle – at least, that's what they're supposed to do.

But Cosmo didn't care. She didn't want to be here. It was a place for lifelong fighters, for people who had dedicated their mortal existences to reaching it. For them, it was paradise. But for someone who wanted a peaceful life, who wanted to stay with the friends they had finally gained after so long, who, fundamentally,  _ just didn't want to die _ ...

She stared out of the window. An unbelievable vista stretched out before her, with massive golden buildings as far as she could see. Winged figures darted about the sky, while countless ornately dressed people milled about below them. And in the distance, stretching out over a massive, impossibly dark pit, before suddenly steeply dropping into its core, was a bridge made of rainbows.

It was this bridge that she was staring at. She didn't remember much about what happened immediately after her death. It was mostly a confused haze, punctuated by shock and terror. But she remembered the rainbow bridge, and as such, it was the first thing she asked about.

_ Bifrost _ . The path that connected Asgard with the world below. The only link she still had to home.

If only she could reach it.

Every day was the same. Fight your way through a horde of gladiators all out for your blood, reach the entrance gate again, slip through the comically oversized bars, and be stabbed in the throat by a gang of Valkyries.

Cosmo was really,  _ really _ starting to hate the Valkyries.

It was getting unbearable. Not unbearable in the physical sense, the way it had been before, when she was still freshly dead and the concept of respawning hadn't yet sunk in, but unbearable in the existential sense. She was getting used to this, as much as she despised that fact. It was becoming  _ normal _ , and that scared her more than any death could.

It was one thing to have nightmares about Tails' face as he realised what he had to do. It was another to have nightmares about returning to Mobius, and not remembering how to stop killing.

She had to get out. Now, before it really was too late.

* * *

Something was different today.

Cosmo first noticed it as her vines tore out the guts of the third opponent. Her mind had a tendency to wander during these slow phases, when they had decided to target her and all she could do was defend her hill until they got bored. She took the opportunity to glance around, looking futilely for anything that could help her escape.

There were far more Valkyries than normal at the gate. This was discouraging, but what she saw them doing gave her pause. They were flying back and forth on their winged horses, depositing ragged, shellshocked-looking people in front of the bars. For each one, the gates would open, and their faces would suddenly light up as they realised where they were, before they yelled a battle cry and leapt into the fray. Cosmo had yet to see one that didn't. It seemed like this was just the kind of person who usually got in.

This wasn't, in itself, unusual. For Cosmo, each new recruit was both a new annoyance and a new opportunity, as the gates opening provided a nice moment to get out. But she had never seen this many at once before.

She took her chance. Bisecting two more warriors with blades of sharpened wood - a surprisingly good weapon, as it had turned out – she charged towards the gate, reaching it just as it clanged shut. She waited a few more seconds, her plant minions twitching nervously, before, as she predicted, it opened again. She slipped through, and the crowd of Valkyries tore her apart.

As she slipped back into the darkness, she smiled slightly. She had a good feeling about this.

* * *

"What's up with all the newbies?" she asked, with a forced casual tone.

The warrior looked surprised for a moment, as she had never made an effort to speak with any of them before. In her defence, they were usually too busy alternating between killing each other and heavily drinking.

"War, I think. Some new thing, probably some giants involved. It happens."

Cosmo resisted the impulse to ask about the giants. "So, is this what happens when a war starts? Lots of people coming in, newbies to show the ropes... maybe some overworked Valkyries?"

This tone was already getting hard to maintain.

"Yep. It quietens down after a while – Valks get adjusted, figure out schedules, all that stuff. Why?"

"Just curious." Cosmo smiled a genuine, excited smile for the first time in... however long she had been here. Her instincts were getting good.

* * *

She made her move at night. It seemed right, somehow.

Slipping out of her room, a small pouch of seeds in her sleeve, she carefully made her way to the staircase. She could hear snippets of conversation from below, though she couldn't make out any words. Peeking over the banister, she saw a squadron of Valkyries standing in formation, with one standing on a pedestal at the front and reading names and times from a clipboard. As she crept down the stairs, silently begging them not to notice her, she saw the speaker lower her clipboard, and raise her voice.

"Right. That should cover everything, so head to the armoury. Make sure you get to your assigned areas by oh-six-hundred, and for Odin's sake don't let the overtime get to you. We've got too many incompetent einherjar as it is.

The Valkyries saluted, and began to file out, muttering to each other about "bloody religious conflicts" and "not like we get paid overtime anyway". Cosmo flattened herself against the stairs, waiting for them to pass, then slowly raised herself up.

The seed of a plan emerged in her head.

* * *

Brunnhilde had been working for a full twenty-four hours, and her shift didn't show any signs of stopping. At this point, the honourable dead and the cowardly souls were starting to blur together. She hoped that she could stay alert – the last thing she needed was another citation.

As it turned out, Brunnhilde's hopes were in vain. She was already too tired to notice as a thin vine emerged from behind a weapon rack and carefully tugged away a sword. Neither did she notice the small shadow slipping out from behind the rack and creeping up behind her. She didn't notice anything until there was a blade pressed against her throat.

"Hi. What's your name?"

It was a girls voice, and a fairly young one. Brunnhilde was too stunned and sleep-deprived for her training to kick in, and she reflexively told her.

"Nice to meet you. You think you could do me a favour?"

The voice sounded awfully nonchalant, for someone who was holding a sword to someone else's neck. "What do you want, assassin?"

"Oh, don't call me that. I don't plan on killing today." The sword dug into her neck slightly, and Brunnhilde noticed that it was being held not by a hand, but by a vine wrapped around the hilt. "Or _ever_ again."

Brunnhilde went for her dagger. Another vine wrapped around her hand, twisting it behind her back. The voice continued, as if nothing had happened.

"I just need one thing from you. Give me your insignia."

"I can't do that." Her training was starting to come back to her. "Release me, assassin, or you will taste the blades of my sisters."

"Give it to me, or I'll cut out your trachea and strangle you with it," the voice retorted calmly, with the definite air of someone who had done that before.

Brunnhilde went for her other dagger, and her helmet was suddenly torn off with great force and dropped right back down onto her head, hitting it at the precise angle for a nasty concussion.

As her consciousness faded, the last thing she heard was "Wow. I _really_ need to get out of here..."

* * *

The winged horses of the Valkyries were, all things considered, fairly intelligent animals. The problem was that they were only trained to obey people carrying Valkyrie insignias. Cosmo had deduced this after countless hours of observation, and was very glad indeed that she finally had a chance to use that knowledge.

"No, stop – don't pull at the – the _other_ way – not there, you stupid - "

It was a shame that she had no idea how to ride a horse.

The animal lurched wildly through the sky like a drunk paper aeroplane, with Cosmo desperately hanging on to its golden reins, as well as the six other pairs of reins she had hastily fashioned out of vines. It was drawing rather more attention than she would have liked, and she was quickly noticed by the Valkyries, who swooped towards her on their own, more graceful mounts.

"FORWARD!" She tugged desperately at the reins. _Not now! If I don't get out this time..._

It was at this point that she realised the horse could understand words, as it suddenly shot forward, narrowly avoiding several spears. Cosmo flattened herself against its back as more spears flew over her head, eyes fixed on the gleaming rainbow in the distance.

"Can't you go any faster?" The horse seemed to take offence at this, and accelerated to a speed which might have made Sonic take notice – or, more likely, challenge it to a race. "Thank you."

She looked behind her. Valhalla was getting smaller and smaller, quickly being obscured by the veritable smog cloud of angry Valkyries pursuing her.

"Don't you all have better things to do!" she yelled impulsively, feeling adrenaline flooding her veins and real joy sparking in her mind. This could be it. After so long, this could really be it. After tonight, she suddenly realised, she would either be home, or hopeless.

She flung a seed at one that was gaining on her. The vines bursting from it entangled the woman, throwing her off her horse, and a few more Valkyries broke off, swooping down to catch her. Cosmo laughed, justifiably, at her second bit of vindication in as many minutes.

The horse whinnied nervously as it approached the bridge. Cosmo looked down, seeing for the first time its true size and grandeur. It was easily half a kilometre wide, and covered in surprised-looking Valkyries and souls. The horse lowered itself down, making motions to land, and Cosmo tugged at the reins.

"No time. We're going in."

Then, everything seemed to slow down. She felt her breathing get erratic, as she realised for the first time that she had no idea where she would end up...

... and a spear flew past her face, leaving a light scratch. She looked back, and saw the blood on her horse's wing, and then everything sped up again.

The horse began to tumble, taking Cosmo with it. She whipped her head around, panicked, and caught a glimpse of the hundred-or-so Valkyries below her, ready to catch her, to tear her limb from limb, to send her _back_...

She screamed.

Then the vines, slipping from her control in a moment of frenzy, snapped, and a well-placed kick from her surprisingly strong horse sent her flying. She blinked, frozen, then twisted herself around instinctively to see the ground.

It wasn't approaching as fast as she thought. In fact, it seemed to be falling away. Cosmo jolted, realising her luck.

She tossed all her seeds up into the air. The plants entangled around each other, forming a tangled web. It only slowed the descending Valkyries for a moment, but that moment was all she needed to fall further down.

Everything started to spin. The furious voices above faded out, until there was nothing but swirling colours. Cosmo closed her eyes...

* * *

Cosmo emerged from the darkness again. This time, it wasn't the darkness of death, but merely the darkness of a ceramic pot wedged on her head.

She looked around the workshop, blinking in the light. She saw Sonic, frozen in the middle of a step and for some reason looking like he was about to burst out laughing, Knuckles, in the corner with one eyebrow raised, which was his version of a shocked yell, and, of course, Tails, whose expression resembled a confused puppy, and who was making a similar sound.

Cosmo spat out some potting soil, and Tails hit the ground.

"Hi."

**Author's Note:**

> Been a while, huh? Yeah, like it says in my bio, don't expect any kind of regular updates. That said, I hope you liked this!
> 
> also I know she's flagrantly ooc, just let me have this


End file.
